Tag Archives: People

‘cos it’s a tiny world!

Tis amazing how many time in the last few weeks I have bumped into people who have more in common than I expected:

  • Last weekend, almost everyone I met, there was a person in common. Some of us had even been at the same wedding last year
  • Yesterday, my colleague told me about a call she made to someone I used to know at one point and when she mentioned it to me, I knew exactly who she had been talking about and was truly surprised by the way the call went
  • A couple of days ago, met a client and turns out he comes from my sister school, sister college and we were in the same society, and both of us were within 4 kms radius back when we were in India

These connections and so many odd coincidences….

Coincidences

…. I feel absolutely amazing and am truly, madly, deeply in love with life!

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Our Insecurites Drive Us

This weekend was very interesting from an observational perspective for me… it is amazing how our insecurities drive all of us- I could see them in almost everyone, now I know some of the gang better than the rest and I suppose, because of the amount of time I discussed psychology this weekend, it was playing on my mind so much more.

I could see some of my actions, some of Red’s, some of Tigger’s, some of Ryan’s and some of the other people… and it got me wondering as to how can such intelligent people feel the way we do and act the way we do and what needs to be done to make it all better…
Is it because we don’t trust our instincts as much any more?
Is it because the society is so much more open and we all know what is happening and they are usually non-pretty srtories?
Is it because relationships have become more materialistic and we have grown with that?
Is it because we all believe in keeping up the masks/ appearances a lot more?
Is it because we are concerned about what others think, even if we don’t think so?
Is it because we are scared of taking the leap of faith?

leap of faith is the only transportation

On a different note though, it was a great weekend and despite my dilemma, I am glad I went with it- it was a fun filled weekend with lots of laughs and good memories!

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I’ll take the good

And even though, a part of me believes the bad news, I am choosing to ignore it- ‘cos somehow, the world gives me exactly what I believe in!

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Happy happy people!

Apparently there are 15 things happy people do differently:

I know I am an eternal optimist, even if currently, my foundation has been slightly shaken, and so I am can’t help but evaluate each one of these- ‘cos after all, I like to believe, I am one of the happiest people around (at least in my own bubble ;))

1. I definitely have a lot of fear in me- the fear of so many things- the fear of letting my mother down, the fear of not achieving certain things I want to achieve, the fear of hurting people I care about yet I have a lot of love for the people around me- almost everything I do is motivated by love
2. I have learnt to not worry about things I can’t change and I suppose, in my own way, I define this as acceptance
3. I can forgive easy peasy- but I rarely forget and I know this is a huge thing but so far, I haven’t succeeded 😦 Someday I hope to learn
4. I trust those I really trust and once I trust, I am an open book unless I find reasons to not trust- the levels of trust may vary based on other circumstances too but for the most part, I only trust a very small circle of people- I believe in self preservation- I am not sure I have the energy and strength to go through the pain of being back stabbed ever again in my life
5. I am very ambitious- to me, my ambition is driven by the meaning it brings to my life so in this instance I am not sure of the difference between these two- to me, they are almost the same thing
6. I usually praise more than I criticise. I also realise I expect of others the same levels I expect of me- not a good thing, ‘cos I am setting myself up for failure- no one else. I need to stop finding the small things that bug me and truly enjoy the small things that make me smile- like a hug from my niece Anarkalli
7. I love challenges, I thrive on them- my current challenge is dealing with all the challenges that I am facing together
8. I am definitely not the most selfless person around but then I can’t think of anyone who is completely selfless- everything is driven by some sense of want or need and doesn’t that inherently mean some level of selfishness?
9. Despite my meagre income currently, I am abundantly surrounded by the love, laughter, friends that I really need- if my trip to India was anything to go by, I have learnt even more how lucky I truly am
10. Who defines our reality?! This is a discussion Roark and I seem to be having on a very regular basis these days as we both try to define our reality as a potential couple but yeah, in the meantime let’s keep dreaming
11. I believe I am considerate and this is my way of showing kindness- I may not give the homeless food but I like to believe I always have a nice word for the people I come across
12. I am very grateful for a lot of the things I have in my life- even if I do take some things for granted every so often! Thank you dear universe, once again, for all that I have- especially, my health- the past few scares have been well, very scary
13. I don’t always succeed in this instance- I often go too many steps forward in my own head, I go off tangents, I analyse the past, I think of all the potentials in the future and yeah, often I do enjoy the moment but at the moment, I am truly failing at this one
14. I am an optimist- no doubt here!
15. I do tend to blame (more often something within my myself than not) but still there is room for improvement here

Wow- if I make the changes I obviously can, I wonder how I will handle all this happiness! Hopefully, I will manage to improve on my weaknesses and spread more happiness, smiles and laughs in the world…

And I personally think, happier people hug more- they like hugs, they like showing the people around them they care and after all, hugs are therapeutic!
Here is another article re 15 things to give up to be happy– not sure I completely agree on all of them either but that’s for another day!

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The people in your life

You know, for the longest time, I had a note like that on my mirror but over the years, I have learnt this is actually one of the worst pieces of advise ever.

I would like to change this to “The only people you need in your life are the ones you feel you need.” It kind of reminds me of something an uncle of mine said to me many years “Give to others what you think they deserve- take from others what you think you deserve” and then there will never be a feeling of obligation or a case “I should”.

I have MANY people who need me in their lives, but they may not always be the people I need- I need some people in my life, all the time:

– My mother: yeah, she needs me and I need her
– My mother’s boyfriend: definitely a case of me needing him more than him needing me- this has no corelation to the love we feel for each other
– My best friend, Ryan: totally mutual- we both need each other but to varying degrees for various different aspects of our lives
– My best friend, Winnie: again, mutual but I suspect I need her more- she is a lot more independent than I am
– Some of my other friends: some need me, some I need- you know what, it’s just the way of life- after all, if we were all mutually dependant to the same extent, life could potentially be very boring- though, the one relationship which I think should be such is that of a couple- a husband and wife but even that I don’t think would have the two people equally dependant on the same aspects as a complementary relationship is always much stronger.

Over the past few weeks, I have had a chance to reevaluate my relationships- partly ‘cos I have had to, partly ‘cos I have been forced to, partly ‘cos I have realised how I need to grow up and take some responsibility for elements I had just taken for granted and so going forth, I am only going to focus on relationships I need and if those people need me to, I am in luck- I am gonna put a stop to the tit for tat that seems to be constantly surrounding the way we deal with things these days.

And now- to go celebrate life and one of those people in my life that I love spending time with!

Laters peeps- enjoy a fabulous weekend 🙂

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Just saying…

Thank you to each one of you for the value you have added, the lessons you have taught me, the laughs we have shared, the tears you may have caused, the moments of solidarity and to those of you still around today- you know who you are, I apologise for the grouchiness that has been me the past few days and will be the next few and am really grateful for the support through this tough time!

Here’s to a fantabulous life!

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Sad but true!

Such a lovely quote and so true- i wish we could all learn from this and love the people in our lives and use the things in our lives!

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I Believe

Since I can’t change the situation I seem to be stuck in, I have decided to make the most of it by bringing a smile on  my face everyday myself and so I am gonna try my best to share a thought of the day that I have come across, that I truly believe in for the next while.

To kick off… I believe in possibilities 🙂

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It’s all about the people!

So a few days ago, I was talking of a mini hub that power couples form, and here’s an example of a lady who has her mini hub with her partner and few other individuals who she uses as sounding boards, as feedback generators and confidantes.

At the end of the day, you are the sum of the people you hang out most with! And that’s why I choose people with drive and ambition to achieve happiness and success in their own lives, people who think differently to me yet respect my opinion, people who have their own lives yet balance making time for the important things in their lives (ie friends and certain activities), people who think big, people who imagine, people who live and not just survive.

So today, think about who you surround yourself with? Because that could be the limiting factor in your success!

PS Does this mean I need to purge a few relationships?! Hmmmm…. food for thought!

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Crossing paths…

It is said, we cross paths with certain people in our life for a reason. Sometimes, we know the reason, sometimes we realise the importance of some people and sometimes we just float along…

There is another theory that says we attract the type of people that share our aura. The way this theory works is that if your aura is clear and energised positively, then you attract similar people- people who truly deserve to be with you and people who truly complements your strengths and weaknesses. And when you are “not clean” yourself, you attract the “not-so-good” elements in life.

So I have been trying of why certain friends of mine always gravitate towards the wrong type of people in their lives- Curly spent the best past of the last 6 yrs hoping for something with the biggest plonker on earth, Dr F did not always choose the right women before he met Mrs F (and I absolutely adore her), Crystal has a history of the worst women one earth and let’s not even talk of Spartacus! So it should not surprise me Ryan messes up so often too…but I have my own theory (surprise, surprise). I think, people can have different auras for different things. I mean all these people are absolutely awesome people and attract the best of the best in their life- colleagues, best friends, friends but somehow, they (and I) haven’t always been the most successful in personal relationships. Why is it that we all have chosen the wrong people and some of us continue to do so?

I mean, Crystal never thought he would be the lady he is with today. She was so not the type he would usually go for but she is the type I used to push him towards. Thank God he eventually heard me, because he is so happy with her and they make an excellent couple- so grounded, so caring and so perfect.

Dr F used to be with people who never matched his intellectuality. Mrs F may not be the business brain he is but she can hold her ground in so many fields he is clueless about. And she can play so many avatars- from a grungy night clubber to the perfect elegance for a black-tie event, she can play the perfect partner without losing her individuality.

Curly has yet to find a partner but I suspect the changes she is making in her life are going to help really well. She has taken the right steps and banishing the guy from her life will only make it easier for a new one to come right in.

Spartacus and Ryan now are a different kettle of fish. They are both keen to find the right partners, they are both keen to meet someone that describes their idea of perfect but they are not keen to make the effort to meet them. Spartacus goes for women who make the first move- so he is always letting them choose- at least they are strong women. Ryan on the other hand goes for the low-hanging fruit- which usually means that the best, though tough to get to, gets left out and even though there are a good few of what he describes out there as his perfect partner. This gets me wondering is it because of their (our) fear of getting hurt- all three of us are very alike and similar. I let the guy always believe he’s made the first move (am a girl after all and like to let the man feel cavemanlike) but even then, I turn away some really good men away because I don’t feel the chemistry there. Am I being too choosy or is it just that our auras are not clear enough for the correct person to come our way?!

I can’t do a thing about the others, but I can certainly try and make my aura cleaner and so I hope the changes I have been trying to make go towards all my auras being clear and me only inviting the people that actually provide a reason, that match my energy levels and that add that something special- be it as a friend, a colleague or more- to cross paths with me and become a part of my life. I hope my mates do it soon too because it is really irritating to see them with people they really shouldn’t be with.

 

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