Tag Archives: Life


I characterise March as Bliss. What a wonderful month it has been:
– Personally: some fantastic memories created with Red, lots of laugh and tonnes of parties, great moments with loved ones
– Socially: hung out with some great people, got to make new friends, re-bonded with some old ones
– Professionally: all goes according to plan, which makes me happy, content and satisfied.

What else does one need really?! Laughs, Friends and Good times x


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Whoop!! I called it!

February has been AN epic month:

  • Work has kicked a$$
  • I have had surprise lunches, dinners, spontaneous plans that have been fun
  • Attended parties, enjoyed massages, had dates with me
  • Opened up some amazing conversations with people I enjoy discussions with
  • Cooked some delish dishes
  • Written out my plan for the next while
  • Embraced some beautiful moments with friends and family
  • Soaked in some rays
  • Planned a new adventure
  • Accepted (what feels like a million) wedding invites of people I care about
  • Laughed, laughed and laughed some more
  • Loved, loved my friends, loved my family, loved myself and loved my life

I am a truly happy person today, cocooned in happiness that radiates from every pore of me!

Told you it was going to rock, didn’t I?!
Hope you had a fab Feb too and here’s to an amazing March! May it be as brilliant 🙂 xx

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2 sets of everything…

I live a life where I have almost two of everything- 2 black trousers, 2 black jumpers, 2 black pairs of boots, 2 pairs of black high heels, 2 sets of outfits for most occasions, 2 things of regularly used spices, 2 shampoos, 2, 2, 2…

Yup, it seems like a waste in many ways but there’s a lot of freedom in it too… I have the option to enjoy my buzzing, constantly on the go city life when I want and the calm, big garden oasis close to town; I have the option to have my own space when I want it and the option to share it with someone when I do; I have my own little woman cave and my own entertaining pad… the practicality of it is anyway amazing but the benefits are too UNTIL I realise I only have 1 thing of gelatin and it’s in my townhouse and I am too lazy to go back for it- I mean, it’s easier to go to a shop and buy some more instead.

Sometimes, there’s a dark lining in a usually silver cloud and I love this space to write about it, deal with the momentary obstacle and get on with my busy life 🙂

Boo hiss to no salmon terrine but boo yeah to everything else!

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THIS February

I feel it in my bones… and no, I am not referring to the utter, bitter, horrible, freezing cold but to the fact that something magical is unveiling and I somehow don’t know it yet!

comfort zone

You heard it here first! Exciting exciting exciting times await xx

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I re-emerged!

Tonight, I was out for dinner with 2 of my best friends- these are girls I have known for years, hugged, cried, partied with, laughed with, been in hospitals with (not all at the same time), etc etc etc- these are MY girls. I am VERY lucky that I have a lot of such girlies in my life 🙂

So we did our usual once every 4-6 week dinner catch up and it was, as always, delightful, too short and once again, we had to be removed from the premises because we lost track of time. Yup, even after marriages, babies and such, when we get together, it’s still a little silly (on club oranges too, I will have you know- it’s all the sugar from the fruit, I tells thee!!)

As we were talking, I somehow felt I have come out of a shell, after almost a good few years, I laughed and slagged the way I used to, I talked as much as I used to- I hadn’t realised how much I had changed till I felt like this again- whether it’s the moon, the time of the month, the friends, the mood I was in or just the decision I made last week but all in all, it’s a pretty awesome way to be and I love it.

I am so glad I am on such a high… the high of life… long may it continue xxx

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Yup, we can…

Often, we start on a path and realise we need to amend it but are unable to do so  because of our ego, our belief we should stick to the original plan or some other influencing factor…

But sometimes, changing the path IS the best thing ever- I have altered mine and I am over the moon because of it. BRING it on! 🙂 Whoop.

brand new ending

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Guilt, Be gone!

A few years I made a decision. A decision to put myself first.
This cascaded into minute impacts all over the place- they started off tiny but they were huge.
Some of these impacts I have been feeling guilty about… and some of the consequences I am not happy about, but that’s life and I understand it.

The longer I live, the longer I analyse the decisions I made:
– Was I right to move countries?
– Should I have said no to certain ideas?
– Would I be better off back in the corporate world that I left?
– Have I made the ethical decisions?
– Did I ever break my own values?

And yes, I made mistakes. Who doesn’t?
And yes, I wasted time following certain thoughts.
And yes, I let myself be influenced by factors that shouldn’t have influenced me.
And yes, I got to the point that I am at today.

A point in my life, where I am with a wonderful partner, a fantastic set of friends (many that I have known since I was 3/4), an amazing family despite all our faults, a great experience, financially debt free, able to take the holidays I want and enjoy most of what I need and yet, I worry myself with guilt.

FFS, Guilt, be gone. I am a happy person focusing on the right things in life and it’s time, I said goodbye to all things toxic- the past 3 years of cleansing has been good and I feel I might actually be at the cusp of a new inner revelation.

I love life. Especially  on evenings after god-knows-how-many-months that I have actually managed to paint my nails and sit with them in the air while doing nothing else, guilt-free. Whoop!

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Stop crying!

Get a move on- cry, learn and move on… c’mon, you can do it x

dont cry at the same thing

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Good idea

I am an exceptionally lucky lady and very grateful for that- I have an amazing partner (even as I do consider the possibility of us having to let practicality win and me head away) and some of the world’s most fantastic people in my circle of friends. I was reminded of this as I spent an amazing weekend with some fun people who I can laugh with, experiment my cooking on, be silly with and share serious conversations with.

Always, surround yourself with the people you love and admire. Boo to the negativity and the hassle of anything else.


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I looked back…

We all know I love a spot of introspection every so often! I know looking back is never a good idea but I think there’s a difference in looking back to learn and staying in the past.

So I had a moment of clarity a few days ago- you gotta thank relaxing in Monart for this- there’s something about sitting and chilling yourself to have those hallelujah moments- stillness is where it’s at. In 2012, I declared myself to be more about me and putting myself first and doing things that I want to do. I still believe that decision and I still love the fact that when we can balance the difference between putting ourselves first and being selfish, it’s the right attitude to have. I do believe that though I said it in 2012, it’s only now I truly believe it!

A good few years ago I was convinced I should walk away from a situation, to some extent I did but I wasn’t willing to let go. So I stayed on. Today, I look back and realise I was not giving myself the self-respect I deserved and needed. I knew I had a lot of supports around me but I stayed on because I couldn’t imagine the change I would have to undergo if I broke free.

Down the line, a friend of mine is in a similar position and I am advising her to break free and not make the mistake I did. And she is scared. It’s only human nature- that’s why I didn’t do it. I do wonder how much we hold ourselves back because we are scared!


Here’s to me having learnt my lesson, realising my worth, standing up for myself and decloaking all the uselessness I used to carry. And here’s to everyone else taking that brave step forward.

Peace out x

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Eventually glass cracks!

Those in glass houses should not throw rocks- this was one of my English teachers’ favourite idioms.
She was so poetic about it, it went on to become one of my core beliefs and till date, I am anti-hypocrisy. I am sure there are times I have come across as one, people have misconstrued my intentions and thought so or whatever the case, I do know that I have tried to be as honest and unhypocritical (s that even a word?!) always.

One of the things I prided myself on as a kid was the ability to see things in the varying shades of grey- to me, no situation, no scenario, no truth, no fact was completely black and white. Ok maybe, some facts- especially the one stating every action has an equal and opposite reaction. I am hoping this gets combined with karma and it really is a case of whatever you sow, you shall reap because in my opinion and experience, those who do throw stones froma glasshouse eventually do see them shatter!

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Something beautiful

So the other day I was talking about the end of a very close friendship to another friend.

For obvious reasons, I am sad- it’s a huge part of my life and I do feel sad that thing went this sour but they do make for great memories.

She said to me, “The best way to look at it is that for each of you, the most beautiful thing of your lives emerged from the embers of this friendship.”

That’s such a beautiful thought!

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A Downward Spiral…

I was in such a vortex about 3 years ago- 2012 was a terrible year for me in many ways.
There were some 3 people that hurt me with their actions deeply, a lot of words said that broke my confidence, factors that made me wonder about the viability of a lot of things and because each thing was upsetting me more than the last and each disappointment was coming on top of another, I was on a downward spiral.

Through a lot of introspection, a lot of logic, a lot of sense, a tiny group of trusted confidantes, a busy social life, I faked it till I pulled myself out of the spiral. Every so often, I see people in that place. Sometimes I try and speak to them, sometimes I stage an intervention and sometimes despite my saying anything, they choose to ignore it.

The worst bit is when I see a friend/ an acquaintance/ someone I know going through this and not realising it. What I often also see is people in that state is their negativity is so strong they aren’t open to hearing the truth- how do you go about this?! Any ideas, peeps?It’s sad to see a person find negativity in everything even if it’s not meant to be!

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Somedays all one wants to do is remember the boxing days, don on some gloves and punch the sh!t out of a punching bag!
The one thing that keep it sane for me is the really good set of people around me to pick me up, guide me, help me, make me laugh and just the ones who also understand trust and loyalty along the same vein that I do.

The only thing stopping me from truly having a punching session is a recent conversation with a friend after almost a year. For us, that’s usual- we tend to do that. She has seen me through so much, known aspects of me that few others have (mostly due to the fact that she has known me so long), been there when I broke my heart each time, turned to me every time her heart was broken, advised me when I took a misstep, looked at me for guidance when things weren’t necessarily perfect for her… it has been about 4 years since we saw each other in person, but when we are in 2 different continents and travel patterns differ, it can be tricky to make paths cross! It is also a confirmation yet again that my gut tends to be right.

Her words to me made me feel great, happy and accepting of the life situation I am in currently- the good, the bad, the exceptionally ugly, the not so ugly, the stressing, the irritating and the fun and the challenging. Her belief in my ethical compass and morals has further grounded me in my journey of life.

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Adventures rock!

Amen to this:

great adventuresI love adventures and the lack of knowing what is gonna unfold- I have had some amazing ones in the last while and the current one is terrifying, exciting and nerve-wrecking: life is a journey that I am glad to be traveling.

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A wee pep me up!

Recently, I learnt a good trick to pep me up when I am beginning to dip after a high…

I think of 5 things that made me really happy in the last 24 hours:

1. Falling in love with my 3 day old brother’s kid
2. Making two MASSIVELY HUGE decisions for work
3. Identifying the director I want with me in my company
4. Celebrating good friendships over wine with two very good friends
5. Planning an animated movie Christmas night out with a friend followed by a mountain of food
6. Meeting an absolutely amazingly inspiring lady during work

How awesome a day was it?! 🙂

Here’s to celebrating the little things in life!

every day a chance

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I want, yes WANT, a few things in life.

wonderful– I want happiness- not the concept that we seem to be talking everywhere but my own version of it- doing things only because I want to and not cos I have to. I started this about 2 years ago and it was the BEST thing I ever did.

– I want genuine people- I have blinders towards people who are gonna be racists, jealous, demotivating and immoral- still will be civil and will maintain the relationship I feel it befits but I may not genuinely trust or care for you the way you may think you deserve from me.

– I want health- doesn’t mean skinny- I haven’t had that for years, but I want to continue my long walks, my sporadic swimming, my even more sporadic yoga, my healthy eating buzz, my clean living lifestyle and tonnes of meditation!

– I want enough- enough love, enough money, enough sleep, enough work, enough things to do, enough books to read, enough of everything I may need. I want to be able to buy whatever I want without having to worry of cash, I want to be able to spend on whoever I want to spend it on without worrying.

– I want a home- not a big house or anything per se, just something comfortable and full of love- somewhere people like coming to, somewhere we have fun, somewhere we shares laughs and many special moments but never feel it is too cramped.

I want a lot yet not a huge amount. I am looking forward to all this unfolding in my life!



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Nov 6, Thursday: Letter

Dear Life,

This week has been a bombardment of amazing experiences, craziness and just general silliness. Thank you for the moments such as these- my feet hurt, I am shattered, my liver screams in pain but it makes for great stories, fabulous memories and a happy life.

Thank you, thank you, thank you- I absolutely would be just a shell if not for you and the passion you ignite within me.


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Winds of Change

I feel the winds of change blowing- don’t ask me why, don’t ask me how. I don’t know the details but…

I feel a shift- a shift towards a more peaceful me
I feel a calmness- a calm that is not pre storm but the calm of positivity
I feel an excitement- an excitement of what is coming
I feel content- content knowing I have done my best and the future is exciting as can be

I am impatient, I am like a kid waiting for their birthday presents, I want the changes, I want to feel the wind and I am really really really looking forward to it!


Did I say really?! 😉 I truly, really AM! Woohoo!

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Relations, Decisions, Ownership…

You know, life is a funny curve- no matter what, the other side seems greener! This is in no means an admission that you aren’t happy but maybe not always satisfied… I am in a really good place, life is fantastic and everything seems to be working out just the way I want it to AND I love it!

And then there are the tough decisions that no matter what the result, even if it what you want it to be, it doesn’t make for easy discussions or easy journeys to a decision. I somehow seem to be caught bang in the middle of three massive decisions, of which none is immediate so therefore tonnes of hypotheticals being built in one’s head and no real action as it is impossible to do so.

The decisions of owning certain assets together, the decisions of the right time to have kids, the decision to adopt kids, the decision of where to live, the decision of moving to different continents for one’s career, the decision to plan holidays around certain big events that mean a lot to one person, the decision to share the responsibility of a pet, the decisions that would potentially be easy when in the thick of things but tricky when you have time to think…

Oh for just a few moments I wish I was single and carefree but the support, the love, the laughter and mostly, the silliness, I will put up with this all this growing up jazz that gets thrown our way. 


Finding your kind of crazy

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Today, I felt a feeling that I hadn’t felt in a while. To some extent, I wonder if the past has made me pick up on it sooner than not.

For the past 2/3 weeks, I have felt everyone around me seems to presume I will always be around and I am able to do everything in a jiffy, with no help and with no drop in standards. Earlier today, it got to me so much that I absolutely broke down and cried. The sort of cry I needed but not the sort of cry I could blame on alcohol or hormones.

I also realised I am very sensitive to fatigue and hunger… those two individually are dangerous when associated with me but together more so.

However, what I am proud of is nipping the feeling in the bud by ensuring I told the people I cared enough about exactly what I feel and asking them to cop on! Here’s hoping the words have been heard and the change is coming.

Additionally, after 6 years, I am amazed that I still feel a slight twinge about TL. A part of me goes to ‘what if’, another wonders if I will ever get married and I question my ability to ever commit, especially in the wake of the number of engagements happening around me… weird how our heads and emotions work…

cherish the little things

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Keep it SIMPLE!

Life, that is!

simple life copy

Don’t complicate it, just do it!

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The good, the bad, the ugly

Today was an interesting start to the day!

The good: A friend I am very fond of got engaged.

The bad: Another friend I am very fond of passed away unexpectedly.

The ugly: When I heard the news re the engagement, I did wonder “why them- since they started after Red and I did”. This upset me, hurt me and is something I just don’t like 😦 I am not sure why I felt this way either- it is disturbing me. (Red, if you are reading this- it is not a veiled hint!)

Definition of tomorrow

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Breathe, Breathe, Try Again

Yeah, picture captures it all!

Dreams don't expireSweet dreams xx



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You know the biggest advantage of writing my weekly person is in actually counting the people in my head I think of writing of and latching on to the one I haven’t written of- sometimes, I use people who are on my mind because I have had some recent interaction with them.

Sometimes, I avoid writing of some people even when I have thought of them because I realise there are no longer important to me- call it being selfish, bold or whatever but in the past 2 years, I have switched my life completely, some people were part of the ride just because, some people forced me to get on the ride and some people have supported me through it.

The past 2 years have been a tumble in many ways, have taught me about life and people more than I could have ever imagined and truly taught me the value of karma and forgiveness. I have seen it do it’s ‘thang’.

I am definitely a better person today than I was two years ago- albeit short of a lot of sleep and more stressed and panicked. I am also definitely a stronger human being than I was two years ago- mostly because of people like my mother, her partner, Red, Winnie, Shrew. I am most definitely more confident- if that were even possible. AND most importantly, I am definitely happier than I was two years ago- 2012 was and remains one of the worst years of my life but I am glad I went through it and I am so glad I endured it and stuck it through.

My priorities over the past few years have changed.
The people I care about over the past few years have changed.
I am glad my value system over the past few years has remained.

For all of you out there facing your tough times, hang in there.
For all of you who have made it through, well done you.
For all of you who will face it, never lose faith in yourself and the wonder that is life.

Love to all.

worst thing could be the best thing

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Models & Systems

Today, I was listening to a talk given by a friend’s friend on creating your own world and bubble and he stressed on 2 aspects: Models and Systems of living.

My notes below- doubt they make sense to anyone else!

Models for living:

Create your own
Make your own beliefs
Find a way you believe yourself and not something defined by others!

Systems for living:

Re-living the good moments at night
Lucid dreaming- exposes you to new aspects
Consciousness Engineering
Envisioning method

Focus on your understanding and beliefs on Abundance, Relationship, Health

I suggest signing up with http://www.MindValley.com to understand this aspect more.

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Mar 12, Wednesday: Future

There are so many things I want to do and achieve in life!

After many days, I am going to try capture a few on paper:
1. Upgrade my car by June 2015- yes, I am planning ahead but this one is for certain reasons
2. Replace an item I don’t have anymore- vague on paper but I know what I mean and I think I have found the right replacement too
3. Consider the next stage of my life- do I want to get married? do I want kids? When do they all work with my life.
4. Plan holidays- I need some adventures ahead of me
5. Travel Europe again
6. My company is now doing well and I want it to do even better so I can have a steadier (& bigger) income
7. Sell my photographs to fund my holidays
8. Design, build my dream house
9. Inspire others
10. Be the best human being I can be to the best of my knowledge

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It may be short but you live it every single day:

You live everydayGO LIVE! NOW. (That’s an order)

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Oct 7 Monday: Gratitude

1. Finances
I am so glad I have an inate sense to be financially independent and have rainy day savings! I am considering things that people take ages to do and well, in my impulsive/ spontaneous style, I am 90% immersed into it. All because I saved.

2. Confidence
I was in a weekend long session and realised I was confident enough in myself to not drink when others were putting pressure on me. Someone even commented that they thought it was odd and they wouldn’t feel comfortable but I was happy out not drinking!

3. Life
I lost a friend last week (RIP A&J) and once again, it made me stop and take stock of my life. I am so so so lucky to have the friends I do, the life I do and more importantly, to be alive to realise that!

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Jul 22 Monday: Gratitude

1. Travel
The holiday was amazing- I loved it. The way it all worked out, our timing, our plans, everything… I am still on a high from it all.

2. Music
I am a fan of good music- a lot more than it may come across sometimes but well, such is me. I was at a music festival and am at one every week for 3 more consecutive weekends- 4 weekends of music, fun and friends- I like it ALOT.

3. Life
Just everything seems rosy at the moment, I am loving it.

Dear Universe, thank you, thank you, thank you!

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Life is pretty darn good

These days all seems to be going well… I was talking to a friend of mine who was trying to understand my “relationship” with Red and I surprised myself by saying this:

Screen shot 2013-06-04 at 22.56.27I have almost always been the relationship sort of a girl, I have fun but don’t get serious but this time, there is something different. Lady keeps wondering if I am compromising on what I want but the truth is out there- I am happy, I am having fun and yes, I would be keen to know if we have a future but hey, there’s no crystal ball!

break, forgive, kiss, love, laugh, no regrets, smileAnd you know what, I might be doing something unconventional, I might be playing with fire but I am creating memories that make me smile and hopefully always will.

AND I am meeting some amazing people 🙂 All in all, I am pretty damn happy with the way my life is!

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The kind of Love we all aspire to…

I seem to be getting a lot of love stories these days and they are very sappy and cheesy but kinda cute….

Here’s another I like!

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman, probably in his 80’s, arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, I asked him if he had another doctor’s appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.

He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer’s Disease.

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, ‘And you still go every morning, even though she doesn’t know who you are?’

He smiled as he patted my hand and said,

‘She doesn’t know me, but I still know who she is.’

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought,

‘That is the kind of love I want in my life.’

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be. Life isn’t about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain.

Life= storm and dancing


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Upgrade yourself and the world around you!

A simple reminder- yes, a new door opens when an old one closes- keep your eyes open!

attract betterAnd this image says person but it holds true for everything in life- EVERYTHING. Trust me.

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May 6 Monday: Gratitude

1. The Universe and the Law of Attraction
I cannot get over my luck over the music I got to listen to this weekend. I am still in awe of all the talent in this world, still have goosebumps of all the amazing sounds and still skipping with happiness.

2. Friends
If it hadn’t been for my friends, I would certainly have not enjoyed this life! I am oh so blessed with the right people in my life to enjoy my fabulous fortune with!

3. Family
My sister went through a surgery last week- hopefully the last and all seems to be on the mend fine. Also, my family held a special ceremony to bless certain opportunities in my life right now- all in all, their support and love means the world to me.

Thank  you ALL for all I have, for the love I have to give, for the love I receive, for the luck I have been experiencing and for the fabulously blessed life I lead.

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If music be the food of love…

… I have had the most romantic 3 days EVER!

I have been to many music festivals, I have heard lots of bands but the last 3 days have been just different… I hadn’t planned any of it, it kinda all just happened and I am on a HUGE high!!!!

I even went away for the day to see John Grant perform- it was amazing- so much more electronica than I had expected. All in all, amazing!

musicSo today I went to the county that Red was spending his weekend in. Bumped into a lot of his friends too. He didn’t know I was there and I still haven’t informed him. I feel I shouldn’t need to- just cos we are in the same place doesn’t mean we should meet… am I weird that way?! Many of my friends think so but he had his plans and we hadn’t really been in touch… Of course I will tell him when I see him- we even put a pic on his friend’s fb just to let him know! Ah well… I am still too much on a music high to give a damn!

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April 29 Monday: Gratitude

This week the 3 things I have to be most grateful to:

1. The friends that give me hope when all seems dead:
The Shrew on Wednesday when tears came down in a 5 star hotel bar
Candy for the hug and the laugh when she saw the tears in my eyes on Tuesday
Harry for the hope for working out a plan for one of my companies
Lady for the surprise dinner she hosted last week
Winnie for the chats on Wednesday and the follow up call with my mum, and the loooooong chat on Friday

2. The strength within me:
When all seems dead and without hope, I know I have the courage to keep going on.
When all seems dismal, I still try my best to find the silver lining to some extent.
When I do want to be looked after, I still know how to be independent.
When someone is looking after me, I know to accept it and let the guard down.

3. My life:
For all that I am giving out about it, for everytime I raise a doubt- I am in a VERY enviable position- great friends, I have a great job and am financially doing well, My companies seem to be getting some traction, My family is all doing all right, I lead a fabulous social life that is enviable by many

All in all, I am grateful for a lot of things but these would be the top 3 for me right now. I somehow suspect there will be a lot of repetition on Mondays but if it gives me the chance to stop and think and thank the world for all that surrounds me, then it is well worth it!

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If things were normal, life would be too boring

And this captures the current state of my love life (and every other aspect) absolutely perfectly!

normal vs my love lifeI wish I knew what I want in my relationship with Red- I can’t blame him since I can’t articulate it myself yet- aaaargh! It’s such a case of the blink leading the blind!

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Good rules to live by

So last night I was out celebrating life with a lot of my friends. As we all know, my life has been very blessed, surrounded with some amazing people but even then, I have made some big mistakes- mistakes that have taught me valuable lessons!

I wish I had known of these rules in the past:

7 rules of life

(even though I do suspect I may not have appreciated these rules before I went through the experiences I have!)

So, please, peeps, do pay some heed to them- even if it’s only to a few!

Happy Life!


Filed under Friends, Health

Go with the gut

You know, the other day I bared my soul open (yet again). I talked of how guilty I felt, how I second guessed myself and how I haven’t always followed my instinct!

Well, I got this sent to me on email- thank you for the beautiful words and advice!! I love it

trust yourself = learn to live

To everyone else out there who may be wondering if they are doing the right thing, take a deep breath and remember- TRUST YOURSELF.

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Filed under My Day

In the past year…

A lot happens in a year- I truly believe this:

a year

This time last year, I would have counted Tigger and Ryan as two of my closest friends, Candy & I were going through our own transition, I cared a fair amount more than I do about Chammiya, I didn’t really know Lady, I hadn’t met The Shrew.

However, more than that, I think I have finally understood why I hated 2012 as much as I did.

1. Of my trilogy of “best” friends, two of them were not there for me. The rocks and support I had were moved from under me and I felt my absolute core shift and me not understand it. I have always kept myself guarded in the past ‘cos of my dad- I let it down most to certain people and two of them used it to hurt me. And boy, they hurt me- not by getting together (I couldn’t be bothered by that) but by not realising that it affected my relationships with them individually. At no point, did they try to preserve the individual friendships we had but that’s the passion of a new relationship. At least they are happy. And hopefully soon, things will calm down a little. I do hope the image below always reminds me of the sort of romantic relationship I want and how I want to ensure my friendships remain unaffected so as not to be on this side of the scale.

relationship happiness

2. I felt I was more like my dad than not and I didn’t like it. I had ended my downward relationship with TL and been made to feel guilty. I ended my downward business relationship with Ryan and the guilt in me wrecked me. I felt I had walked out on 2 people who expected more from me, who wanted more from me and to whom I couldn’t give. I broke ties the way my father did. TSG was awesome in making me realise how different I really am.


3. I was with Roark this time last year and kinda hopeful about it. This year, I have been with Red for over 2 months now, we are not in a relationship and we may never have a future but I feel more safe and secure with him than I have in the longest time. He gets me. I do hope we are given a chance to figure out “us” but then again, c’est la vie.

when you both want

Last year, according to many friends I was stressed, I was wound up, I was scared, I came across unhappy and I truly lacked focus. I needed the year to build myself up. This year, everyone has seen a calmer sense in me- I have accepted my faults, my weaknesses, my shortcomings. I am stronger, I am softer and I am ready for the challenge that life throws my way- I have been lucky to have found some amazing people who have stepped in and decided to help me out. I am truly blessed. I am lucky. I have a fabulous life.

accept, confidence, fear

I also realised I have been second guessing everything, been looking for my father’s approval, been wanting to do it right and in the process, have gone against my instinct and therefore, ended up on a longer route to where I may have been going but hey, it’s finally beginning to get there- slow and steady eh? 😉

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Filed under Family, Friends

Die once!

Am I a cat so? I have lived alot and died a few times!

You live everyday

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Filed under Ramblings

Do we complicate life?!

Do we make life more complex than it needs be?!
Life= short, terrifying, confusing

Why do we choose to hide behind masks, not share our thoughts, play silly games, give in to our fears?!

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Spring in the step

It’s the simple things in life that make one happy.

Today, I got sunburnt- normally not something to be happy about but it’s great to have the sun on my face for so long, the long drive in my car, despite the weather…

Today, I also caught up with 2 very good friends- one that I see regularly enough and one that I don’t see too often despite being very fond of her…

Today, I also had a smile on my face due to some random texting with Red…

Today, though I hardly slept, though I am exhausted beyond belief, I am delighted with the reaction a customer had to something we delivered to them…

Today, my energy levels are shot, I am getting ready to go away for a weekend with practically nothing packed, with stress levels being very high and all that, BUT I have a spring in my step ‘cos a lot of small things came together to make it a great day!

Thank you Universe. I truly appreciate all the love you are sending my way.

everything is extraordinary

Life is fabulous right now. I feel absolutely great! I wish to bottle this feeling and smell it every time I feel a little down or share it with anyone who doesn’t have a smile on their face!

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Filed under Dating, Friends, Management, My Day

An Ideal Scenario

Today, while talking to a friend, we decided to not just think short 1 year visions or any such thing but describe an ideal scenario, that’s slightly realistic and what a day in our lives might look like in 3 yrs, 7 yrs and 10 yrs. I tried my best and am not sure how realistic I am being but hey, it’s just a dream, right?

dream is in your heart

3 years

In 3 years time, I hope to be living in with my partner, with at least 1 company doing really well and me being in the process of selling the other one. I wake up in the morning and go for a walk/ swim/ ride close to the house or else we are living on the land where my dream house will be built. After this, a good long shower, we share a healthy breakfast and then I head on to work in my office. At work, I have an excellent team with great passion for their work (and yes, an EA to assist me!). During the day, I take at least 3 breaks- one lunch to catch up with a mate in a nice restaurant, 2 coffee breaks to catch up with people.I go for a walk post work or some such activity while catching up with a friend before heading home to a nice dinner over a glass of wine, maybe sitting on a swing, looking into the distance and having a great chat with my partner (potentially planning adventures!). At night, I sleep well (well, after some vigourous exercise perhaps!) and wake up refreshed the next morning.
Additionally, I am driving a car similar to my current one but a more updated model, have my bike, get regular massages, am healthy and maintaining my weight at the optimal value. I am not worried about money and am leading a fairly secure life. Am potentially already married and in a comfortable loving relationship, possibly planning a family. My family are all doing well and I have few worries. I am in a happy spot.

Happy = looking beyond imperfections

7 years

In 7 years time, I hope to be with my partner and potentially 1/2 kids. If possible, I would like to have adopted a kid (law allowing!). I should have sold 2 companies (inc the one I sold in 3rd year) at this stage and am running a small startup or am in a comfortable job that allows me the freedom I want, getting a salary I really appreciate. At this point, I am hopefully living in my dream house, with my dream car and dream bike.
I wake up in the morning- go for a nice, long walk. I come home to have a quick swim before a shower and good breakfast with the family (yeah, we have a nanny to mind the kids and a housekeeper to cook/ clean/ help around the house). After breakfast, I drop the kids to creche/ school and head to work. At lunchtime, I head away for lunch with a friend before bringing the kids home. Once home, the kids do their activities while I work from my home study and then the kids and I spend some time getting some fresh air/ exercise before they get ready for their dinner and bed. At this stage, my partner returns home, we have dinner, enjoy a beautiful evening before going and using our jacuzzi under the stars and heading to a nice, relaxing sleep.
I am healthy, getting massages regularly, doing well financially, enjoying life, sharing life with a good set of friends, spending a lot of time in both India & Ireland & traveling. I see a lot of my family (also, my partner’s cos it’s mine too) and we are a healthy unit. All in all, it’s a happy world. I am still involved in the community, I am still pursuing my hobbies and I am a strong individual with a good dependant relationship with my partner.

almost like my dream house

10 years

This is the year I would ideally like to soft retire. I have sold off all my companies, sit on about 5 company boards and 2 charities. On the side, I am doing projects that keep me happy and I feel challenged by. This way I get to enjoy a good work-life balance.
Life just keeps getting better and better.
I wake up in the morning and go for a ride on the horses. After a good ride, I get home to shower/ swim before breakfast with the family. The breakfast is a happy affair which gets everyone in the mood for the day. After breakfast, kids head on to school and I head into my office (potentially at home) to work. I step out at lunch to meet a friend/ colleague and also have a coffee out. Late afternoon is time for some activities with the kids before my partner arrives home. We eat a beautiful meal/ go for a walk/ have some friends over/enjoy some time together before getting a good night sleep.
I am still enjoying life and it is becoming better day by day by day.

future is based on today

Things I am going to just expect as part of my life: my time with my friends, my time with my family, my strong personality, I will have something to do with education, I will start a trust fund, I will be a part of the society, I will be in a strong dependent relationship which allows both of us to maintain our individuality, I will still be shooting, I will travel loads, I will maintain my standards of health and body, I will maintain my defined standards of care and maintenance, I will head out socially on a regular basis, I will buy the necklace I want, have an active life and a strong relationship (in exercising terms too!). I will be happy, I will be content and I will be successful. This is not a case of waiting 3-10 years but always, from today/ tomorrow/ as the right time for it to be a part of my life arrives- the sooner, the better!

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Filed under My Day, Ramblings

And so begins 2013…

… a new adventure
… some new excitement
… a better year- well, it really can’t get worse than the last!

And what better way to capture it than a facebook status I saw!

new year wishes

Dear 2012- thanks for all the lessons, the joys, the downs, the hope, the darkness and the memories- good & bad, but it seems, we were at an impasse and not going anywhere so here’s to us parting ways. I am sorry I met another year- it’s called 2013 and it promises to be full of promise, optimism, results and achievements!

dance, love, sing, live

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The 5 Ws

When you can’t decide, use this as a starting point to help!

5 Ws

Live, live in a manner that allows you to be true to yourself. And don’t forget to have fun 😉


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And then it seems…

Like FINALLY everything is falling into place.

It has been ages, it has been insanely irritating, it has seemed like I should give up, but then- the penny drops. Or so it seems! How long will this last… who knows?!

May it last long… Hope you are in as good a mood!

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Life’s too short.

Just go do it!


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Happy Diwali

And it’s that time of the year- the time to celebrate, to forgive, to wish, to start anew and to light loads of candles!! 🙂


May this year hold the key to all your dreams coming true. Be blessed, be safe and enjoy a few laughs!

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Filed under Culture

In this materialistic world…

… this pics hits the REAL truth!

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Filed under Ramblings