Category Archives: Friends

The Feel Better Factor

Over the years, I have come across loads of different types of people. Surprisingly 😉
There are usually ones I warm up to instantly, some I am a bit cagey about and some I can’t tell why I don’t like.

Often, in the ones I don’t like initially, there are a handful who change my mind about them but often, turns out my gut was right. These people have this amazing ability to eventually make you feel better about yourself, have fun with them, trust them and so on and as you start getting comfortable and changing your initial belief about them, BOOM.

They start saying comments that make them feel better about themselves. Now I, for one, am all about the self loving! I love me and I think everyone should love themselves. BUT it’s not doing you or anyone else any good if you can love yourself by putting others down. Their comments may be slightly snide only or they may be masked as advice but never have I come across any that are genuinely helpful.

Over the years, I have been trying to weed such people out of my life and surround myself with those full of love and gratitude, those who don’t compliment me when they don’t want to, those who only advice me when they can add value or when asked and those who genuinely wish me the best.

Down with the frenemies! I wish there was a way to eradicate that gene in every single human.

ego and soul

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Filed under Friends, Health

Encased

There are moments… when out of the blue… I feel so warm, cosy and fuzzy. It is not because someone wrapped me in a blanket or because someone did something for me but it is a sense of security in knowing you are surrounded by a massive amount of love and there’s nothing that can penetrate that amazing layer.

I am in a genuinely enviable position to be with a man who doesn’t have me on a pedestal and he ain’t on one either (unless it is to change a frigging bulb) but a man who recognises me as an equal, who respects me for who I am, who does little things to make me smile and big things to get a rise out of me, who may not always understand my point of view but always empathises with me, a man who truly wants to look after me knowing full well that that is exactly what I want to do for him.

I haven’t seen him in a few days. When I am sick and tired as I am, it feels like a lifetime. Yet, I go to bed knowing I am a very lucky lady to have my friends, my family and Red.

I hope you feel as secure, content and loved and know the feeling I am trying to capture in words. Good night x

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Filed under Dating, Family, Friends

Bliss.

I characterise March as Bliss. What a wonderful month it has been:
– Personally: some fantastic memories created with Red, lots of laugh and tonnes of parties, great moments with loved ones
– Socially: hung out with some great people, got to make new friends, re-bonded with some old ones
– Professionally: all goes according to plan, which makes me happy, content and satisfied.

What else does one need really?! Laughs, Friends and Good times x

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Filed under Friends, My Day

A 5 hour cuppa!

“So, let’s meet for a cup of tea” slowly becomes a lot of giggles, tonnes of laughter, honest chats, confessions, swapping of ideologies, one knows they have found a kindred spirit.

Today was one such day and I want to mark it, mark it for posterity about how wonderful a feeling it is to meet someone special, someone beautiful and someone so very genuine!

If there is one thing I believe in, for a strong foundation of friendships, these moments are important but they are better when they have been a long time coming… a friendship that sparks from the moment you meet is good but inseparables from point 0 fizzles as quickly as it starts and thus, I consider myself extremely lucky that it took us over 3 years, innumerable parties to have this beautiful one on one.

What a fab way to kick off this week! If this is what 2016 has in store, I am even more excited 🙂 x

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I am a statistic

Honestly, I never thought I would actually outloud admit it but that’s the fact- we are all exactly alike, we want exactly the same thing and we end up doing the same things!

Here’s an interesting read someone sent me earlier today: http://www.girlfriendcircles.com/blog/index.php/2014/01/the-5-biggest-mistakes-women-make-in-their-friendships/

#1: Agreed. I bow down to the persistence of many friends who kept trying to meet more and more and eventually I did and today, they are amongst my favourite people

#2: Amen. Bittersweet truth- my friends have changed, a lot of the very old ones are around but many have changed, some I didn’t expect and some I did… c’est la vie. I have added in many new friends in my group in the last while too though so whoop!

#3: My biggest issue. I feel I am constantly making an effort and sometimes when I step back, I realise I was and so the friendship does fall off the charts completely or sometimes I realise the different strengths. Now I am in friendships where I take more initiative and some where they do… overall, there is a balance in the relationship that works for us!

#4: This bit is fortunately not true at the moment. Or so I wanna believe. Hopefully I will always remain mindful of it.

#5: Guilty. Absolutely do but I think I do it when someone makes me happy too- I exaggerate on both ends but mostly on this space or in my head. I use it as a form of justification for my actions too…

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And then, it happened again!

Well, this time it wasn’t a dream both of us had but once again I dreamed of the same person as a few days ago!

In this dream, I was out for a run with the help of a physio, with Red and bump into the girl I used to think was my best friend. She started helping me, much to my astonishment and so I asked her ‘why’. And she responded by saying “‘cos she cared”.

It was a sad and poignant feeling- I realised I still care for the two of them, knowing me- I always will and it’s sad it has come to this stage. While driving today, I realised how I feel.

Imagine a playground and in the middle of it, a glasshouse. In this playground, there’s a lot of stones, gravel and bits kids throw around and play with using the glasshouse as something to avoid. One day, a kid throws a stone breaking the glasshouse. It’s not the fault of the person who put up in the glasshouse in the wrong place obviously but of the kid who threw the stone.

I am that kid. Well, at least I feel like that. I truly thought I had achieved closure but right now, I wonder and I sincerely hope it comes soon. I am done with this sh!t.

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Freaky or freaky?!

Like almost every other Sunday morning, I woke up, stretched and snuggled into Red… and as I woke up a little bit at a time, I started chatting…

It’s VERY rare for me to remember a dream but I mentioned having a dream about 2 people I used to be friends with and cared (probably weirdly still do) about and imagining a complete parallel reality that would not have been true even if things hadn’t gone down the route they did. That was not so weird, I am doing my whole washing off and assimilating 2015 internally thing BUT Red admitting he dreamt of the 4 of us too but a different scenario- again one not possible either. HOW IS THAT NOT WEIRD?!

Somehow though this has helped me understand the whole situation better and find closure- I understand the role each one of us has played, how each and every one of us is at fault and how it truly started with me not listening to my gut the first, second or third time! I am glad I did NOT listen to my gut to ask her down for a weekend in one of the most beautiful houses I know for some R&R earlier this summer- to catch up, to figure what’s going on and to maybe make it possible to be civil. I know things may be nicer today but I think despite all the other casualties, despite the others affected, despite the pain all of us have felt, I am glad we all know where we stand and I can, somehow, accept it all.

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The balance of the good hearted moaners!

The other day, I was chatting to this couple with whom I have become very good friends- we were realising how friendships have changed and how some we thought would always be around are no longer important, cherished, easy or possible.

It basically got us talking about the different philosophies we all choose to decide who to stay with and who to avoid… and I spoke of the dilemma I had gone through a few months ago where during my cull, I had realised there are some people I quite like, who mean well and are genuinely nice people but just not the ones I want to spend a lot of time with as they can be rather dull or stubborn and more often than not, end up complaining loads. A tricky one eh… how does it all balance up and I found the easiest solution was to reduce the amount of time I spent with them, switch off the brain that gets irked up and just stay calm till I get home and punch a pillow or breathe deeply on the walk home or do the forgiving exercise until I am comfortable enough with it.

Am I doing the right thing or this is the philosophy to follow… I dunno but it works for me, it allows me to keep good people around me in a way I like… all about the balance!

Focus on those who make you smile

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Good idea

I am an exceptionally lucky lady and very grateful for that- I have an amazing partner (even as I do consider the possibility of us having to let practicality win and me head away) and some of the world’s most fantastic people in my circle of friends. I was reminded of this as I spent an amazing weekend with some fun people who I can laugh with, experiment my cooking on, be silly with and share serious conversations with.

Always, surround yourself with the people you love and admire. Boo to the negativity and the hassle of anything else.

girlfriend

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Something beautiful

So the other day I was talking about the end of a very close friendship to another friend.

For obvious reasons, I am sad- it’s a huge part of my life and I do feel sad that thing went this sour but they do make for great memories.

She said to me, “The best way to look at it is that for each of you, the most beautiful thing of your lives emerged from the embers of this friendship.”

That’s such a beautiful thought!
#lookatthesilverlining

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Filed under Dating, Friends

Every goodbye is a sad goodbye

When I was young my mother always warned me to not resist a transition- she advised me that each relationship will eventually change and the best thing to do is adapt with it. Most of the times, I have.

In each case, I have learnt that the other person has adapted too.
In those, where either one of us has been unable to adapt, we have moved apart- sad as it may be, such is life.

Each goodbye hurts, some more than others, for sure.
The ones that hurt the most are the ones where you realise that everyone involved potentially wasted their time because at the end of it all- no matter what, each friendship gives people something beautiful but sometimes you wonder does it all weigh up!

And then there are ones that despite having been dead for a good few years, keep showing up in some form and each time, the hurt deepens and doesn’t get better with time. I look forward to the day when I can look back at each goodbye with that sense of contentment knowing we all gave it our best, it wasn’t to be but there’s no pain on either side (not that I will be able to judge the other side).

In the meantime, to all the friendships I refer to above:
I thank you, I forgive you, I am sorry, I love you, Go in peace.

PS happy birthday FL, I miss you (or the idea of you, I dunno which!!) and that was a goodbye I never got to say.

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An Innocent Bystander

I realised the biggest downside of being in a relationship- it possibly took me forever to learn the lesson that others have inherently known but I did. I have always treated each relationship as between two people but the more I see the world, the more I realise everyone isn’t as clearcut about relationships.

Recently, there was a bit of a fall out between someone I thought was a friend and me- things came to a head yesterday and we have agreed to go on differing paths.

There were a few things that upset me:
– it was yet another miscommunication issue
– after a great day on Saturday, I felt a change to some extent was actually possible but so was not the case
– Red getting affecting without needing to

blame

There are a few lessons here for me:
– not to trust anyone the way I have in the past ever again
– to really try and read the worst in what I say/ write as it will be picked up in that vein way more than it would be in the way I intended
– to think of every relationship from a couple stand point yet treat it as my own singular one

I sincerely hope I can amend my ways before I cause anyone else unintended hurt.
As way of somehow putting it all to an end for me, I wish the people affected the very best and truly hope they get all they deserve. They have been good friends at different times to me and I sincerely wish them well.

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You Just Know

Recently, a friend of mine was talking to me about her experience with an ex.

Even though it’s been 4 years since they parted ways (and a good thing it was too), he texted her out of the blue wanting to renew relations (as if). Through the tone of his texts, she could tell what he was thinking.

This got me thinking:
– Does she know ‘cos of the amount of time they spent together?
– Does she know ‘cos that’s what she wants to think even if she disagrees with wanting to feel that way?
– Does she know ‘cos she has moved on and he hasn’t?

How do you know?
And how do you know what you are thinking is right or not?
Do we really need to turn to such measures to feel better about ourselves?

I know I am guilty of this too- is this just a survival instinct or is this a way of justifying our behaviour?!

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To all those I knew…

Over the years, I have had to say goodbye to a lot of friends.
I have learnt, it’s usually not necessarily personal but a diversion of two people with two different ideologies and priorities.

I saw this today and it made me smile: this captures it beautifully.

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Thank you for the memories, you all.

More importantly, thank you for letting go. Wish you all the very best x

 

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So be it!

Over the past 10 days, I have been at odds with Ryan.

He thinks I said something I shouldn’t have and I think he jumped to conclusions he shouldn’t have- it is an obvious misunderstanding but I have tried to make amends and make calls which have been ignored.

Being told to apologise to him last night peeved me off- we are both at fault and I did make move but haven’t been acknowledged and am tired of him never making a gesture. To some extent, I suspect ego will win this war and a part of me is too tired to care.

Ryan, 

You have been a very good friend and a great business partner in the past- we have had our differences on many levels and I am sorry to see our friendship has reached the point that it has. I have no clue where this junction will take us but at this point, I am going to leave it to the universe to guide, decide and lead.

I wish you luck with everything and the future. Hopefully someday we can be egoless and adults about this and you will know an apology is a two way street.

Joy.

90% conflict due to tone

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Written a 108 times individually- leaving it to the powers that be. So be it!

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Sep 30, Tuesday: A Beautiful Moment

A friend of mine called me today- I haven’t spoken to him in 3 years at least but then he and I are like that- we have a blast when together, we keep in minimal contact and we are just always the best of mates.

We are now planning a weekend away in October since he will only be a few hours away.

Last time I saw him was in Laos when I was doing South East Asia. The 3 days of spending time with him, the 3 days of pure alcoholism, the 3 days of sharing great stories, the 3 days of tubing, the 3 days of slagging, the 3 days of laughter make for a great memory and I am so glad to have a friend like that and I am so excited about the prospect of seeing him again at the end of the month.

I so hope the trip works out!

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Jul 22, Tuesday: A Beautiful Moment

Yesterday, friends and I were talking of pets and I was reminded of a moment with my first dog ever.

We were out playing one evening as we did almost every day- rain, sunshine, wind- nothing stopped us going out (much to the adults’ frustration!). It was during the  monsoons and there were frogs EVERYWHERE! The dog being curious, decided to eat a frog- in reality, she only swallowed it. The memory of her retching up a few minutes ago is not very pretty but the look of confusion on her face, the look of amazement of my friends and me is something I would never forget- ‘cos as she was throwing up, the frog came out and leaped away as if nothing had happened.

Some 20+ years on, I still wonder if that scarred the poor frog for life!

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“It’s not you, it’s me”

Classic break up line all right but is that all it is? Or is there some truth in there?

Since 2010, I have lived with 2 separate friends and in each, I have initiated a change in our relationship- whether it was colleagues, housemates, business partners, etc. Both of them were my best friends when it started but somehow I felt like I had been through a break up each time!

(Somehow, romantic breakups are easier to take!)

I decided to take a moment to step back, reflect and see what the learning in this was- after all, losing friends is never fun. In both scenarios, I still consider them friends and will be there for them, should they reach out.

1. Court a friendship: If a friend is not interested in responding to your courting attempts, take the hint!
2. Know your boundaries: When we start dating, we know what we wouldn’t take for in our partners. Similarly, know the boundaries and when you are not feeling the love, distance yourself.
3. Stick to your morals: I believe in friendship forever, I do believe it transitions shape and form through the years. So if a person has been a friend and we haven’t had a falling out, I will always do my best to be there for them.
4. Quality time: The BIGGEST thing to me. In both those cases, we were spending a lot of time together but never truly quality time. Sometimes it is about the time together, doing something different, experiencing a new activity or whatever else!

After having spoken to friends who have known me a lot longer, a lot shorter, a lot better, only a little, I feel no one is ever at fault- I am sure I did something to upset them for them to stop considering me a friend or showing me the love at least but I hope that in the process, no one was really hurt!

Enemy vs friend

Reach out and let your friends know you care!

 

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Givers and Takers

Over the last few days, I am realising that I have managed to surround myself with more takers than givers which automatically makes me a giver… somehow, this is now causing me a little bit of resentment, anger and frustration!

I know the only person to blame here is me- it is my expectation, my silly hope, my stupid idea of believing in change and falling hook, like, sinker every single time. I now understand the romantics a lot better!! A part of me wants to believe it is not a lack of self respect but I do think it could be- every time I plan to move on from such a friendship, I seem to be sucked right back into it!!

Ah sure, one of these days, I will hopefully learn!

dont be unsure

And if you are sure you are not really on their priority list, re-evaluate if they should be on yours!

 

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Re-prioritising….

You know the biggest advantage of writing my weekly person is in actually counting the people in my head I think of writing of and latching on to the one I haven’t written of- sometimes, I use people who are on my mind because I have had some recent interaction with them.

Sometimes, I avoid writing of some people even when I have thought of them because I realise there are no longer important to me- call it being selfish, bold or whatever but in the past 2 years, I have switched my life completely, some people were part of the ride just because, some people forced me to get on the ride and some people have supported me through it.

The past 2 years have been a tumble in many ways, have taught me about life and people more than I could have ever imagined and truly taught me the value of karma and forgiveness. I have seen it do it’s ‘thang’.

I am definitely a better person today than I was two years ago- albeit short of a lot of sleep and more stressed and panicked. I am also definitely a stronger human being than I was two years ago- mostly because of people like my mother, her partner, Red, Winnie, Shrew. I am most definitely more confident- if that were even possible. AND most importantly, I am definitely happier than I was two years ago- 2012 was and remains one of the worst years of my life but I am glad I went through it and I am so glad I endured it and stuck it through.

My priorities over the past few years have changed.
The people I care about over the past few years have changed.
I am glad my value system over the past few years has remained.

For all of you out there facing your tough times, hang in there.
For all of you who have made it through, well done you.
For all of you who will face it, never lose faith in yourself and the wonder that is life.

Love to all.

worst thing could be the best thing

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Don’t be…

 

Don't settle for less than the best

.. yeah that!

 

And don’t be someone’s handkerchief for when they need your shoulder for their tears.

 

The last few days I have been surrounded by people who just seem to want to rant or somehow, despite the amazingly beautifully sunny days, don’t want to smile! Actually, I lie- many were happy but the some tat weren’t… did my head in- enough for me to wonder if they are worth my energy at all.

Calm. Breathe. Forgive.

To all of you rubbing me the wrong way- take a deep breath and let it all out. I love you, I forgive you, I thank you and I am sorry. I am sorry and I forgive you. Go in peace.

I have used that exercise more often in the last few days than in the last few years, hehe.

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Winnie, looking at you!

For you Winnie- have a fabulous holiday!

Behind a successful womanMiss you loads and love you loads more xxx

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Jan 23 Thursday: Letter

Dear Good Guy & Wife,

You are one of the best couples I have seen in my life- so well suited, so happy and so loving. Individually, you are amazing people and together, you are awesome too- never do you make someone else feel like a third wheel and never do you feel that everything has to be done together. Thank you for being 2 of the people I automatically think of in the moment of need, people I think of when I want to just be myself, people I think of when I want to have fun.

You are so warm and so inviting- please stay that way. And keep giving me them warm hugs.

I am SO very glad we are friends and hope we remain so for a good long time ahead of us.

Much love,
Joy.

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Jan 16 Thursday: Letter

Dear VG,

We met once and became acquaintances.
We crossed paths again and became buddies who had been to the same place at the same time.
We discussed books, culture and had many an argument and somewhere along the line, became mates who do tea/ mate/ coffee/ burritos/ wine/ whatever else we fancy…

Today, I am so glad we are mates and we have the friendship we do- from random nights out to the moments where we try to embarrass each other but more importantly also for the friendship we share.

Thank you for being so important to me now and for being one of the lads!

Love,
Joy.

PS India is a fab country :p

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And so I am peeved…

… maybe irrationally, but I am!

The other day I was trying to make some plans with a few friends. 2 friends responded positively. Since then, I worked out the logistics, did some shopping for bits & bobs etc, turned down other plans and so forth… only for them to cancel for other social engagements they agreed to go to! And in all honesty, it actually suits me better but still!

FFS- makes me feel like second rate citizen in their eyes.

On one hand, they are constantly saying they want to be more social, see more of us, hang out with us but on the other hand, more often than not, they cancel.

Ball is totally in their court- no longer am I am going to try and include them in anything.

candle in the dark

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Run…

To all my close friends who give out to me for not having turned to them:

i almost run to youThank you your amazing friendship in 2013 and here’s to more good times in 2014! Have a fab new year 🙂 Lotsa love xxx

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Dec 19 Thursday: Letter

Dear Crystal

You are probably one of my oldest male best friends and I am so you are a part of my life in whatever form it is. We have seen our differences, we have seen each other through broken hearts, crushes, stupid moments, family holidays and shared many good moments. We went through our bumpy patches, our confusion between platonic and romance, our difference of opinions on certain life matters but through it all, we remained friends. I see you once a year if I am very lucky, I see you and the whole family if I am luckier- I slag you, you slag me; I laugh with you, you laugh with me; I share my concerns with you, you share yours with me- through everything, we are friends. I miss our chats and I look forward to lying on a balcony in the summer, drinking beer and eating cherries some night while gazing at the stars!

Many balloons to you!

Love,
Joy.

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Dec 5 Thursday: Letter

Dear Freud

Its been a decade and then some- we have seen each other through phases we didnt realise we would ever have to face, we have stood the test of time by not talking for months and then spending a weekend of arguments and discussions that would make many people wonder how we did it!

We know the dark secrets we don’t wanna talk of anymore, we know the points we want to shout from the roof top, through driving lessons and through hospital visits, we have seen loads. May we see loads more. Can’t wait to see you at dinner tonight!

Love,
Joy.

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Nov 14 Thursday: Letter

Dear Moo

It’s you birthday and what better day to think of all the things we have gotten up to since we were kids. We became friends the first day of school, we sat next to each other in Nursery B, we missed school buses together in the morning, we ganged up against your brother today, we parted ways as our parents moved houses, we remained friends through letters, we ended school together and we see each other once in 5 years if we are lucky but weirdly, when all goes wrong, we call each other first. You have taught me the true meaning of friendship, the true meaning of caring and the true meaning of love. Someday, we will be the skype/ google/ other technology reunion ad cos our story is just that special.

Can’t wait to hear your voice in the next while when I sing Happy Birthday to you.

Love,
Joy.

https://joyoftraveling.wordpress.com/2013/02/23/old-truly-is-gold/

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Nov 7 Thursday: Letter

Dear TSG,

We met on a date- we had a great time, we chatted for hours, we texted for days, we knew what we had was special but we also learnt pretty damn quick, it wasn’t to be a romantic one… we could have walked away and let it be but somehow, we got through the hump and we became friends, very good friends- friends who don’t get enough time together but friends who love the time we do get, friends who share stories, friends who share secrets, friends who depend on each other. To be able to call your daughter my niece is a testament to the friendship we share. I am very happy you are a part of my life, for the laughs we share, for the stories we swap and for that we communicate even when we say nothing. Thank you for being you. Thank you for being a part, an important part, of my life.

Love,
Joy.

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Oct 31 Thursday: Letter

Dear VTT

I am so darn glad you are a part of my life. We met about a year ago, ended up chatting about war and politics till 4 am one random evening and started planning dinners, pints, coffees and just pure fun. Today, when I am stuck at a work problem, you are among the first I call. And I know it is the same for you. We share our moments of highs and lows, we solve our issues, we discuss our plans, we advise, we slag, we are friends. I would almost definitely count you as one of my close friends today.

Thank you for being you.

Love,
Joy.

PS The weird thing is I could never say this to your face- it would completely kill our bromance.

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Oct 29 Tuesday: A Beautiful Moment

Today I woke up to terrible news re a robbery in Ryan’s office. Obviously, I am in shock and disappointed with someone doing something like this. But as my promise to self is to focus on the good, my memory today takes me back to my first big fulltime project with him and us sitting at home, eating a fabulous dinner, drinking champagne and being so tired that we fell asleep on the couch instead of partying as much as we would have liked!

Sometimes the rewards is in the little things- like friendship, laughter and sleep! Ryan, I hope you get through this tough period.

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Oct 24 Thursday: Letter

Dear CK,

You ladies came into my life by chance- we met for a coffee to see if I could give you the advice you needed. We met again, to become friends. Today, I use you guys as my sounding boards, as my advice centres, as my friends for support and I hope you do the same for me. I love you guys.

Thank you SO much for your help, your advice, your support, your words, your wisdom and most importantly, your laughs.

Much love,
Joy.

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To my friends…

It’s been a tough few days so here’s why I love the fact that those of you who have been here for me are still here for me…

attracted cos of kindness, smile and laugh

And for those of you (a certain H among them) who know what I am going through and still haven’t reached out, I hope you mature up soon and here’s blessing you with love and kindness. I forgive you and ask you to forgive me.

And for those of you who aren’t around, I hope you have a good excuse 😉

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Oct 3 Thursday: Letter

The Beautiful,

You darling, I love you. Simple as. We met randomly one afternoon, got chatting, exchanged numbers and actually did food/ drinks/ chats and today, you are amongst the girls I think of when in trouble, the girl I think of when I need a few laughs, the girl I come to for advise and the girl I devise evil plans with. I am so glad we are a part of each other’s lives and I am so happy we are the mates that we are. I hope we continue to grow as friends, grow together and certainly meet more often!

Love,
Joy.

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Adventures….

This weekend, I am hosting a few of Red’s friends- to me, it’s kinda odd ‘cos it’s very couply and very girly… fair play Red, fair play! I am loving it ‘cos I get along with all these people so wonderfully and I care for each one of them strongly. I am so glad he has a good set of friends that I am slowly making mine.

an adventurous life means leaving a pieceI have many of those adventures where I do risk my life, do silly things, bungee jump, surf in the Atlantic etc but I do hope I am succeeding in leaving a little of me with the people I meet along the way.

Here’s to adventures!

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Sep 26 Thursday: Letter

Dear NLP,

It was good to finally catch up with you a few days ago- alone, just us. I am still concerned about you and really hope you sort yourself out soon! Despite you being an arrogant fool at the best of times, despite your irritatingness every so often, I am glad we have become good friends over the last while and shared many moments of hpapiness together. The road trips, the gourmet tours, the wine drinking days, the laughs- they have made us stronger friends.

Here’s to many more adventures together!
Joy.

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Sep 19 Thursday: Letter

Dear A

I have known you for over a decade- we started off as work colleagues and despite all odds- our work departments, our age differences, we have over the years become good friends. And I am really glad of it. You have been a mentor, a mate, a father figure and most of all, a support to me through many occasions. I am absolutely delighted we are friends still and I look forward to our continued conversations by email, texts, over lunches, over coffee and over fine wine! Especially in the last year when you have had your issues, I do hope I have been able to be of some support to you too. Thanks for being such a huge part of my life.

Love,
Joy.

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Sep 5 Thursday: Letter

Dear H,

The chances of us having been friends had we met in other circumstances are few. The chances of us actually acknowledging each other in other circumstances are very few too but somehow through some weird twist of fate- here we are. I hardly know you, you hardly know me but when we are together, we have a lot of fun and it is absolutely brilliant. I am glad you are a part of my life and want to wish you all the best for the new chapter you are about to embark on soon.

Best of luck!

Love,
Joy.

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Aug 22 Thursday: Letter

Dear Chammiya,

Thanks for having been a part of my life for the short time that you have- it has been fun, interesting and educational. We have had some good times, done some amazing things, tried some new experiences, had some interesting fights and managed to get closer despite all odds.

Great to have you as a part of my life!

Love,
Joy.

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Aug 15 Thursday: Letter

Dear Candy,

We met 3 years ago and instantly became friends. Our first dinner date and we knew we were inseparable! You went on to then get engaged, ask me to be your bridesmaid, make a room smell like mangoes, make me real cheese cake, drink wine with me, allure me with cocktails when we wanted a quiet movie night and what not… when we both reached a new chapter in our lives, we moved in together. The rollercoaster of a ride has been amazing- I see you more often than ever even though I can’t recall the last time we had a real heart to heart, the last time we chatted about our dreams, our fears and our plans or any such thing. I miss having the lolz with you but I am really glad we are the friends we are. Here’s to us driving each other insane, having silly conversations in the hallway and always being a part of each other’s lives!

Love,
Joy.

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Aug 8 Thursday: Letter

Dear C,

There are days you infuriate me, there are days you make me want to pull my hair out, there are days I don’t wanna talk to you, there are days you are too arrogant for your own good but deep down inside, you are a fantastic person and I care for you, greatly. I am glad I have a Yes person in you, someone who is up for the laugh, up for an adventure and always ready to have a good time.

I do hope you sort your issues out and I hope we always remain friends & keep making some crazy memories over the years to come!

Love,
Joy.

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June 27 Thursday: Letter

Dear Red

You have only been a part of my life for a very short period of time. Over this period, you have been rather important to me and I cannot but thank you for ALL the help you gave me to cross the obstacle that was in my path earlier today. I truly appreciate the number of times you have just done things for me, helped me out, introduced me to new experiences and I am not so sure my liver appreciates the amount of partying we get up to or my body the lack of sleep… but either which way, I am glad you are a part of my life and I certainly hope we can keep our friendship growing stronger all the time…

Thanks again.

Love,Joy

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June 20 Thursday: Letter

Dear Lady

You being away from me for so long without us talking or seeing each other is just not something I am used to- for a friendship this young, you mean a lot to me. We differ in so many ways yet somehow, we find common ground and we push each other in ways unknown yet support each other in a manner that’s just amazing, I love our conversations about EVERYTHING- the work, the plans we have, the businesses we will grow, the companies we work with, the boys we date, the boys we didn’t date, the boys who wish to date us, the friends we share, the movies we see, the love for live music… just about everything! It is such an immense pleasure to have you a part of my life in so many ways.

Here’s to years of friendship!

Love,
Joy

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June 13 Thursday: Letter

Dear Tigger

Due to our ‘confrontation’ earlier this week, you have been in my thoughts a lot more than usual so it’s only fitting I take this moment to thank you for everything, apologise to you for the hurt I have caused, forgive you for the hurt you have caused and let you know I love you, no matter what. We have shared some amazing moments together, we have stood by each other through some tough times, we have pushed each other out of our comfort zones and through it all, managed to share a laugh. We have disagreed, we have fought but I like that we have always understood each other and shared many a cup of tea and chats. I look to many more of those…

Love,
Joy.

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Kahlil Gibran says..

In the sweetness of friendship let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures. For in the dew of little things the heart finds its morning and is refreshed.

Such a beautiful quote, too long to tweet so I am ‘saving’ it here!

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“It’s all in words”

Yeah, cheesy me just quoted the BeeGees!

The image below is so beautiful and so true

a text can change the attitude

I had mentioned to a mate I was going for a very important meeting the other day and about 5 mins before the meeting, I got a text telling me how wonderful I am and how amazing it is that he knows me. Beautiful words to buoy my confidence and further enhance my mood for the meeting… thank you, you know who, for your support. I look forward to many more scones and chats!

So go on, send someone a few kind words today- you never know how it could lift them!

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June 6 Thursday: Letter

Dear Ryan

For the last decade or so, you have been a massive part of my life. And still are. I have learnt a lot from you, hopefully I have taught you a lot. We have seen some amazing times together, built some cool stuff, traveled to some fun places and basically, been there for each other through the fun, the not so fun, the good and the not so good. I like to believe we have both grown up to be the people we are by influencing one another through our initial adult years. Thank you for always being there, thank you for opening my eyes to a lot of things and thanks for being you.

Love,
Joy.

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May 30 Thursday: Letter

Dear The Shrew

I may have known you a short time but you are not less important to me. I attribute our friendship totally to you- thank you for reaching out, for making the effort, for being there for me, for spoiling me, for believing me, for pushing me to new limits, for testing my boundaries and teaching me new boundaries… for being you. I am absolutely delighted we are such good friends. I love the fact we are who we are and you are definitely one of my soul sisters. Here’s to years of us being an us.

Love ya babe!
Joy xxx

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A Comfortable Silence

 

friends pick or lie

I remember scoffing at the idea of a friendship being a true friendship when the 2 people could spend time in silence… and today, I realised how true those words are, yet again.

I spent a whole evening- almost 7 hours with The Shrew, we were both wrecked, hadn’t spent time in ages and just needed to hang out together and so we did. We hardly spoke, watched 4 different movies and ate all sorts of sh!te but it was comfortable and chilled and something we just needed to do together.

I love my friends- they are the best. Thank you world for giving me the best set of friends!

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