Somedays I feel like such a sucker, and today- I feel like the biggest sucker ever!
16 years ago- suckered for the first time by the only guy I ever caught cheating on me
14 years ago- suckered for the first time by a guy I thought genuinely cared for me
12 years ago- suckered by my own father
and the list goes on…. till
Last year- suckered by my best friend (surprisingly Calvin has been through this before and the 2 of us only realised the similarities today- well I knew about them earlier but we only talked of them today)
Today- my own lecturer.
The funny thing is all of them have been men- the men who have tried to manipulate me in some way, who have taken advantage of my niceness and my brain for their own gain and at some point, I truly need to f*cking grow the f*ck up.
I think 2012 will truly be as awesome as I expect it to be only when I really grow up.
On the other hand, Calvin offered an option to play with a new idea and go forward with it- considering he is one of my only two male friends I feel the way I do about, it is a very tempting option and I have told him I will get back to him end March with hopefully a negative…. fingers crossed it works out that all I do is advise him as I have in the past.
Here’s to things actually working out, and for once, in my favour.
Mind f*cked and braindead- hope you are all having a better day!