So men feel that there are still expectations of them. Here’s my view on each of their points- I am going to rant, and really rant, so if you have the time, this is the moment you go get that cup of tea/ coffee, a few biscuits (I’ll take a chocolate HobNob please), put the feet up and read my rant.
1. Make Money
Who expects this? The women who are so busy earning so much that they don’t have enough time to spend it all? The women who are actually scared to tell you they earn twice your amount because it hurts and yes, I mean hurts, your ego? The women who are high maintenance but they maintain themselves and don’t expect you to do that- if you treat them well, they will stay with you but that does not imply gold shoes or diamond belts, it means just looking after us? What independent lady today asks for the man to be the main bread-earner? Yes, I want a guy who can support me but that doesn’t mean I’ll stop working or that I wouldn’t do my part- I mean, a relationship is meant to be two equals right. Two of my favourite idols in the working world are ladies who have stay-at-home husbands- so there. I personally would lvoe to marry a writer or someone creative so there is no competition and I can be at work without worrying about neglecting the kids I’ll have someday! I want a man to have enough money that I am not supporting him completely but it’s a partnership and I don’t expect a guy to fuel my need for designer shoes/ clothes/ sunglasses/ jewelry or whatever else I spend it on!
2. Win! Win! Win!
Again, who wants you to win? The same lady who loves you for who you are? The lady who doesn’t care whether your title says President or Manager or whatever? I do care about the passion and pride the man has for his job- but that’s because I stand mourners and usually men who have no passion or pride in their careers/ jobs do that because to them it’s work and a way to make ends meet which shows a lack of ambition. Ambition to me is NOT all about power. I struggled with this one for ages, yes, especially in my early 20s but now, I know for sure, I want happiness and I want my man to be happy too. So, who is telling you to compete constantly? Infact, today’s theory is all about not competing but working together…
3. Be physically strong
What we mean by this is open the jars we can’t open! Not be able to stop a speeding truck with your hand. Seriously dudes, get a life. You love to have those ripped muscles and that sixpack- personally, I like a guy strong and fit but I really dislike those really muscly bodies- I actually love the athletic look more than anything and so if that means, physically strong, ok, fine, I am guilty of it! Anatomically we are built such that men are more powerful but no where does that mean we want Vin Diesel (ugh).
4. Fix stuff
Yes, I like it when a guy knows how to get stuff from the attic, how to change the lightbulb etc but at the same time, that’s a bonus. For one, my brother is terrible with screw-divers, my ex-boyfriend was useless at changing tyres (though I suspect I was always the sucker and just did it while he laughed knowing full-well he could do it) but in this world of being able to hire someone for everything and DIY for all- it’s not just the men who this is expected of. We women have to deal with someone saying “Oh you are such a female” in a snide manner when we can’t do something- but you don’t see us crying about it now, do you?
5. Get it Up
Errr yes, this I do expect of MY man! Ok, not every single time- I mean stress, alcohol etc etc do have an impact on all of us but if you think we can completely ignore the physical side of a relationship, what are we if not platonic friends?!! And it’s nice to have all the words, the hand, the tongue and everything else you mention in your article but like really, one needs the real thing too, you know.
So men, grow some balls (pardon my French) and stop complaining about society expects from you- yes, you are a man but you can still define yourself or do you need a woman to do that too?!
P.S. I realise alot of what I said is taking an extreme view and that the article does try to do some damage control too but all said and done, this is MY rant and not for anyone else really!